Hi Parents, how are you?
This week, if I’m being completely honest, I feel like I achieved absolutely nothing. But there is one small victory I’m very grateful for, I didn’t forget World Book Day.
And if you’re a parent, you know exactly how dangerous those school events can be. They sneak up on you.
I almost forgot.
The costumes were ordered late Tuesday night on Amazon, in that exhausted moment where you’re half-asleep but suddenly remember, “Wait… World Book Day!” I was so tired I just ordered quickly and went to bed.
Both boys had said they didn’t want to wear the same costume.
But at that point? I simply didn’t have the energy to search for different ones.
And normally I never dress them the same.
They’re two completely different humans. Their personalities are different, their builds are different, and even the same clothes sit differently on them. I like them to have their own little identity.
But this time? Same costume. Done. Ordered.
The Chaotic Morning
The morning started… messy. My body was aching. I woke up at 5am, which is my normal time, but I just stayed in bed scrolling on my phone. No motivation. No energy.
Eventually I drifted back to sleep and woke up again after 7am.
For context, I usually get them up around 6:45 so by the time the morning truly began, everything already felt rushed.
Then came the costume drama.
My youngest started crying and saying he didn’t want to wear the costume.
He clung to me saying,
“I want my mummy.”
Meanwhile the clock was ticking.
School drop-off was 8:00am.
Breakfast wasn’t ready.
Bags weren’t sorted.
The morning was spiralling.
The Rule I Broke
In our house there’s a rule:
No TV on school mornings.
If the TV goes on, everything slows down. Getting dressed takes longer. Eating breakfast takes longer. Leaving the house becomes a negotiation.
And honestly, I prefer the boys to start their day doing something calmer reading a book or doing a little learning activity.
But this morning was different.
My older son switched on the TV for his brother.
Normally I would have immediately said no.
But this time, I paused.
And I said:
“It’s fine.”
He’s having a bad morning.
What Happened Next
The moment the TV went on, everything changed.
My youngest relaxed.
The crying stopped.
He slowly settled into his costume.
At some point he even calmly asked for hot chocolate.
That’s how quickly the mood shifted.
And in that moment I realised something important.
Sometimes rigidity doesn’t work in parenting.
If I had insisted on my rule saying no TV, no exceptions, he probably would have clung to me all morning. We would have been even later. The entire drop-off would have been stressful.
Instead, by bending the rule just once, the whole morning softened.
Giving Him an Exit Plan
I also packed something extra in his bag.
A normal pair of home clothes.
Just in case.
I told the teachers that if he saw the other children and suddenly didn’t feel comfortable in the costume, they could change him.
Because the last thing I wanted was for him to spend the whole day unhappy over an outfit.
Sometimes a small accommodation can protect an entire day.
The Outcomes
Yes, we still arrived at school a little late.
But we took pictures.
He stood beside his brother smiling.
The tears were gone.
The stress was gone.
And I walked away thinking:
I’m really glad I chose grace over rigidity this morning.
A Reminder for Parents
If you’re reading this as a parent, here’s the message I want to leave you with:
Sometimes the plan won’t work.
Sometimes the parenting technique you usually rely on won’t work.
Sometimes the rule you’ve set simply isn’t the right tool for that particular moment.
And that’s okay.
Adjusting doesn’t mean you failed.
It means you read the moment correctly.
Sometimes our children just need a little flexibility, a little understanding, and a little space to regulate themselves.
And sometimes the smartest parenting decision is simply this:
Let it be easy today.
Finally
Guys, I have a big confession, come back here on Sunday for some Tea. If you enjoyed this read, check out Pressure free way to support your three old.
With Love,
An Intentional Mum (Ayo)
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