A quiet love letter to baked beans, belonging, and becoming a little more open.
I’m officially ditching Nigerian yams and fried sauce, just for tonight and stepping into the comforting arms of a classic British jacket potato with cheese and baked beans.
Stay with me. This is not just about food. This is about growth, grief, ease… and choosing softness where you can.
It was my first week back at work. Properly back in the office. And it was surprisingly lovely. Warm smiles. Gentle conversations. A hug I didn’t dodge. A year ago, I barely spoke to anyone. Not because I was unfriendly, but because I was grieving, and I felt safer than explaining.
This time last year, I existed on the periphery. For four years, really. People didn’t know my story; they just knew my silence. But something shifted. Slowly. Gently. I decided to expand my circle without forcing it. And this week, it showed.
A friend invited me to lunch.
“I’m making jacket potatoes,” she said.
Cheese. Baked beans.
British through and through.
“For you, I’ll try anything,” I laughed. And I meant it.
What surprised me wasn’t just that I enjoyed it; it was what happened next. I told my boys I’d tried something properly British and I would be making it our thursday dinner. They were thrilled. Grateful, even.
“Thank you, Mummy,” they said. “Now we’ll feel more confident choosing British food at school.”
That stopped me in my tracks.
They weren’t trying variety because I wasn’t making it at home.
So tonight, the kitchen is calm. No long prep. No fish to clean. No sauce to coax into perfection. Just potatoes, forked, microwaved for five minutes, tossed in olive oil, a sprinkle of salt, and a hint of pepper, then baked until crisp on the outside and soft within. Cheese ready. Beans warming. Dinner that asks for ten minutes of my attention instead of two hours of my life.
And honestly? I’ll take that kind of ease any day.
This isn’t about abandoning culture. It’s about adding to it. If you’re raising children in a place you weren’t born, trying the local food isn’t betrayal, it’s respect. It’s belonging. It’s teaching your children that they can be rooted and open.
After more than twelve years, I think I’m finally opening up too. To people. To new rhythms. To meals that make life lighter on busy evenings. To the idea that softness can coexist with strength.
It's our new favourite thing... The boys absolutely loved it!!!!!! I would be more generous with my cheese next time, it was 100.
With Love
Ayo ♡
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